Toys, Girls, and Recycling.

So Tuesday was a very big day for Jaxon. First off we got our brand new gigantic blue recycling trashcans. No longer do we have to sort and according to Jaxon we can put SOOOO MUCH RECYCLING IN THERE!!!!!!! Of course Jaxon being obsessed with recycling was beyond himself excited that we got the trashcans and of course would not stop talking about them ALL day long.

It was also visit Santa at the mall day. I woke up from my sleep-a-thon late that morning and packed the kids into the car. The Santa visit is always a love-hate experience. I loath the lines of screaming children, siblings clad in matching Christmas tree sweaters, moms with gigantic expensive strollers ramming into the back of my heals as they try to move the stroller 2 inches closer to Santa. But Jaxon truly loves the train ride and doesn't completely hate sitting on Santa's lap. Of course this being Bodhi's first Santa experience, we didn't really know what kind of reaction he was going to have. We left the house at about 11:30 and I knew that as soon as we got there Santa was going to be taking his lunch break, so of course I bitched the entire drive there, which I'm sure Justin very much appreciated.

Before we got in the car and in between Jaxon expressing the greatness of the new recycling trashcans, I asked Jaxon what he was going to ask Santa for for Christmas. In true Jaxon fashion and with no hesitation he says: toys, girls, and recycling.

We get to the mall and of course Jaxon insists on pushing our shitty $10 stroller with the 23lb baby in it. The stroller has no steering capabilities, its all muscle. This is why I choose to carry Bodhi everywhere and then bitch about the soreness of my arm, neck, and back later.

So 10 years later we make it into the mall and again I'm bitching to Justin about how the line is going to be 3 years long, and I have to work tonight, and I'm never going to get enough sleep (because the 12 hours that I just got apparently wasn't enough), and blah blah blah. Are you starting to see a theme here, yes that's right, I'm a bitch.

So we walk up to Santa and shockingly there is no line. Santa is hanging out by himself with no matching Christmas tree sweater clad siblings, no crazy fancy stroller toting moms, no screaming baby's with gigantic bows in their hair, it's just Santa. I briefly wonder if Santa has run all the children off with some bad gas? We walk right up and see a sign that reads, CASH and CHECKS ONLY. Well shit that explains it, who carries cash or a checkbook anymore, besides my mom? Luckily Justin hadn't made a deposit from the cash he made the night before, so we had a pocketful of cash. Score, Santa without the line!

However without the line Jaxon didn't have to opportunity to size Santa up. He was just thrown into Santa's lair without so much as one screaming child to follow after. So naturally Jaxon was a little freaked out. He was hiding behind my leg and refused to sit on Santa's lap. Luckily, I'm his mother and I know his sweet spot. This was going to be easy, bribe with candy and the train ride that follows. I bend down to work my magic and I hear Santa calling my name: "mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom" finally on the 20th "mom" I look up at Santa and say "yes". Santa says " just let me handle this mom". Really Santa? You think you can "handle" this? REALLY! Santa was pissing me off. So I sat back as Jaxon ducked behind my leg and I let Santa "handle it" for about 5 minutes. Finally I looked up at Santa and back at Jaxon and said, "Jaxon after you sit on Santa's lap you can ride the train" Jaxon jumped up on Santa like he was a new recycling trashcan. He wouldn't smile, but I think a smile would have been pushing it. I got a half smile at one point when I told him that he could have chocolate but that was it. Of course he wouldn't talk to Santa so his request of toys, girls and recycling will have to be sent via email. I will also send an attachment explaining to Santa that as the child's mother, not a man dressed in a fake beard and gigantic red furry suit smelling like halls cough drops, I know what my son likes and doesn't like. So suck it!

Sweet Bodhi just sat there the whole time, looking into the camera patiently waiting for his brother to stop wigging out.

As always the train was a big hit! Bodhi loved watching it go by as Jaxon rang the bell over and over and over again. Maybe he realizes that next year he's going to have to share the bell ringing with his brother. Or maybe he was trying to prove to Santa that the only reason he sat on his lap was to get to the glorious train. Either way, he had a blast.